Raising Youngins

June 2025

Dear Tessa,

When you’re driving in the car and want to free your mind, but not exactly listen to anything that makes you have to “think,” I know you miss your grandma. You used to call her even if it was for a few short minutes just to say hi, twenty minutes on the walk to class or on the hour drive back to your parents’ house. One of you may have even said “hold on” when you were walking through the UK hospital corridors back to your college house so that all the wind tunnels would pass until you could hear each other again.

She didn’t judge if you called for 5 minutes or 20. She easily let you go – “I’m walking into the house,” “gotta walk into class, it’s about to start,” or “Connor’s picking me up, gotta go.” She probably had her worries about you going away to college, but continuing to keep in touch with her helped her know you were safe.

Now that she’s in Heaven, those are some of the small things you miss most. Her love for you was unending and always available. You tried the short phone conversations with Papa, but they just weren’t the same and that’s ok. He knew you missed her too. Grandmas will take any time they can get talking with a grandkid, so those few minutes with you made her whole day.

You can listen to the saved voicemails for her voice but there’s no one who can say “hello Tessa” and melt your heart like she could.

Good on you for calling your grandma. Good on you for giving her time. If there’s one thing you won’t regret in college, it’s how much time you spend on the phone with your grandma, your Rara.

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